Waldo, next to Waldo Pizza (I’m hungover and I can’t find the exact address right now)
This brand new Waldo bar seemingly sprang up overnight. It may be my new favorite bar. Awesome outdoor upstairs deck with umbrellas, ample, open seating downstairs, and a small back deck if you just have to smoke and the upstairs is packed. Is it a sports bar? Yes. Is it a martini bar? If that’s what you want. Is it a good place to eat? Yep. Whether it’s PBR or fine wine, sports or picking up designer-label-wearing pumas you’re in the mood for, this joint has it. Clientele range from 21-71. I’m going to use my giant vocabulary now to sum it up: This place KICKS ASS.
*not recommended for children under 3
How I ended up way the hell out here I don’t know, but I’m glad I did. What do you get when you combine a bunch of bikers with a jewelry convention? Lake House Pub! This “biker” bar really has something for everyone. Fun, games, fear and loathing, not to mention they introduced me to my new favorite Jager concoction, the Jager Barrel. It’s all a little hazy after that, but I do remember live music, darts and smoking like it was my second full-time job (because you can actually smoke in there, praise Jesus).
Ok, so this isn’t exactly belated, but I thought I’d better inform KCD readers what they’re in for if they choose to see the much-talked about superhero graphic novel adaptation Watchmen. All I can say is the title is certainly accurate – what you will be watching is men. Ambiguously gay (or not so ambiguous) and usually naked. The 300 meets Sin City may sound good on paper, but it makes for an inconsistent style, boring script and super gay homoerotic undertones. Not to mention the movie is three hours long. Dr. Manhattan (the glowing blue guy) is naked throughout the whole movie and can make himself the size of giant buildings. Believe me, I did not need to see that much giant blue cock. No one needs that. No one.
You will never meet the real Carl Spackler here, but several of the regular patrons will remind you of the classic character. Possibilities are good that you will get bitten by a gopher, or maybe it was the owners Shih Tzu??? We’ll never know for sure. No matter what experience you are looking for, this is a great little secret bar just East of the River market!
License to kill gophers by the government of the United Nations. Man, free to kill gophers at will. To kill, you must know your enemy, and in this case my enemy is a varmint. And a varmint will never quit – ever. They’re like the Viet Cong – Varmint Cong. So you have to fall back on superior intelligence and superior firepower. And that’s all she wrote.